Fantasy football punishments for last-place teams (Updated 2022)

As your 2022 fantasy football draft draws near, here are some of PFN's favorite fantasy football punishments to keep in mind for last-place teams.

All fantasy football leagues celebrate winners. Some fantasy leagues dole out punishments for losers — specifically, last-place teams. Across the fantasy football landscape, these sanctions vary widely. As you look ahead to 2022 and the embarrassing penalties you want to heap onto your buddy for finishing last, here are some of our favorite concepts.

And on a side note, if you’re tired of your 2021 team name and want something fresh for 2022, find some inspiration from PFN’s 250 funniest fantasy football team names.

Fantasy football punishments

No one wants to finish last in their fantasy football league. But in many leagues, some managers with bad records simply stop caring midway through the season. That’s why it can be helpful to establish consequences for bad performances — by making people engage in an even worse performance.

The Waffle House punishment

The last-place manager is required to stay in a Waffle House for 24 hours, and each waffle consumed decreases the penalty by an hour. Do you try to down 10-12 waffles in the first few hours and get out of there by sundown? Go for 20-22 and deal with the consequences later?

The best part of this is usually the documentation and watching someone slowly spiral down after each waffle. You’re league-mate will hate it, but his cardiologist will love the extra business.

Play in a U.S. Open qualifier

Heading to the links for a quick 18 is always fun. What is less fun is being unprepared, likely not great, and playing on the hardest course of your life against a bunch of mature and professional golfers trying to qualify for the U.S. Open. The beauty of open events is you don’t need a sponsor exemption to get in. Show up, post a score, and if good enough, you could end up competing for the Wanamaker Trophy.

But let’s be serious. We both know that’s not how this will play out. Not only will the loser of your league have to hear about that until the next draft, but they will spend five-plus hours being mentally and physically attacked by a beautiful golf course. To top it off, the league can watch it all unfold from the gallery. See you at the 19th hole.

Take the SAT/ACT

Imagine the feeling of walking into a room full of stressed-out teenagers in a classroom to take a four-hour standardized test all because you were “too busy and forgot” to set your lineup a couple of times.

Outside of the wasted time, this is a very light-hearted punishment, outside of the embarrassment that comes. While the grade doesn’t matter, whether or not the league-mate has to try is up to the league. The only main stipulation is, unlike back in high school, there is no cutting out of class early.

Singing karaoke

Few things would be worse than singing karaoke in front of all of your league members. That is until you’re forced on stage at karaoke night at your local bar in front of everyone with no control over the song you’re about to perform.

Will your opponents shun you for your painfully poor rendition of Shaggy and RikRok’s “It Wasn’t Me”? Are you sure you want a recording of you blaring out Pat Benatar’s “Love Is a Battlefield” on YouTube? Maybe you’ll think twice about ignoring waivers in Weeks 9-13.

Stand-up comedy

Stand-up comedy is already hit or miss, and that’s by people who are actually good at it. Not those who call themselves comedians but can’t get a chuckle out of an online meeting or at the office Christmas Party.

It’s even worse when that person on stage is being forced into this because they came in last in their fantasy football league and are paying the punishment. Just be sure to apologize to all the people in the crowd who thought this would be a great date-night idea as you walk out of the building after a performance no one will forget.

Lemonade stand

When it’s a child doing this, it’s cute. Even though you know not a single lemon was squeezed, you will buy that overpriced solo cup full of artificial flavors and sweeteners.

But it’s far less adorable when it’s being run by a fully grown adult who is hating their very existence at the moment. Place your stand at a busy intersection, sit back, take a sip, and enjoy the next several hours of confused looks and entertainment.

Solo date night

Everyone likes being wined and dined. Throw on something a little nice and hit the town for a nice dinner and drinks. Four couples, it’s a much-needed reprieve from the grind of being an adult. However, do you ever get hungry and don’t want to go out because it looks weird just eating alone?

Well, wonder no more because coming in last just landed you at the front of the line for reservations and a dinner out on the town. But don’t you worry, you won’t be alone. You’ll have a giant stuffed animal or inflatable doll with you to keep you company. For the icing on the cake — and to league-mates who showed up to eat and watch — make sure to tell the servers it’s their birthday to draw maximum attention.

Other fantasy football punishments for last-place teams

Tattoo time

Like Cousin Eddie said,” That’s the gift that keeps on giving the whole year round.” That it is Eddie, that it is.

You need to have a dedicated league to pull this one off. The tattoo punishment for the last-place manager is about as rough as it gets since that reminder is going nowhere anytime soon. In several cases, the winner of the league is allowed to design the tattoo, meaning they can make it as rough as they want. Spoiler alert, they won’t take it easy.

The piercing

Similar to the tattoo punishment, only less permanent. I mean, we receive shiny trophies for winning, shouldn’t the loser also get something shiny for their placement? The winner is allowed to pick the piercing, and if the league is generous, the loser is allowed to pick the placement.

If not, well, have you ever wondered what it would look like if you had your belly button pierced? I guess there’s no need to wonder anymore.

License plate frame

In this scenario, you’d have to drive around for a year with a license plate frame that prominently tells all close drivers you finished last in your fantasy football league. Add some pizzazz and spray paint “League Loser” on top of your trunk or your back window. If this approach is good enough for “Just Married” couples, then it’s good enough for last-place fantasy managers.

Social media profile changes

You must have the phrase “Fantasy Football Loser” exhibited in all of your social media profiles. This would include Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, etc. Looking for a new job? Should have thought of that before drafting a kicker in the fifth round.

This can also be coupled with the eyebrow punishment where whoever comes in last must shave their eyebrows. Side note, humans look really weird without eyebrows.

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